I Choose 11 Days

In my previous post I wrote about what keeps us from the Promised Land. When I learned the amount of time the journey should have taken the Israelites, I had a very blunt conversation with God. I said "I do not want a journey to take me 40 years, when it should only take 11 days. The life you've given me is short and precious. I do not want to waste my years wandering in the desert. Show me what is holding me back from the Promised Land."

I decided to do an eleven day fast with this request in mind. My prayer was, "God show me what is holding me back, and then deliver me from it."

DAY 1 OF FAST: I woke up remembering my plan to start fasting this day. So I simply stayed in bed and was still before God. My mind wasn't racing, my body was relaxed, and my eyes were closed. Within seconds of doing this, the name "King Jehoshaphat" came to my mind. I searched my memory, and the name sounded familiar but I couldn't place the context. So I kept laying there. King Jehoshaphat, King Jehoshaphat, King Jehoshaphat was on repeat in my head. So I literally pulled out my iphone and asked Siri, "where is King Jehoshaphat mentioned in the bible?" (butchering the pronunciation of his name I'm sure) Siri's response was: 2 Chronicles 19. So I began reading...

Some people came and told Jehoshaphat, “A vast army is coming against you from Edom, from the other side of the Dead Sea. It is already in Hazezon Tamar”.  Alarmed, Jehoshaphat resolved to inquire of the Lord, and he proclaimed a fast for all Judah. The people of Judah came together to seek help from the Lord.

I kept reading...

‘Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s.'

I didn't know it at the time, but God was answering my request. 

After this, He began showing me what was holding me back: my past. I didn't realize it, but I was holding on to past hurts, one in particular. So I began praying for deliverance; that God would free me from this hurt, and that it would not be a part of my future. 

I know that Jesus is our healer and redeemer, so I brought it to Him... sort of. In the middle of my praying I also began making a "healing to-do list." I'm serious, I gave myself writing assignments that I thought would help. It is so easy to take over, and try to control the situation. That is exactly what I was doing. Fortunately God is full of grace and patience. He reminded me time and time again of King Jehoshaphat: the battle is not yours, but God’s. I am a slow learner, I still did not realize God was trying to answer my request.

DAY 5 OF FAST: Our church had a worship night that I attended. (Side note: If you're looking for a church in Charlotte, please join us at Mosaic, we'd love to have you!) The night was full of beautiful songs and a powerful message given by our pastor. At the end, he encouraged everyone to receive prayer. I saw my dear friend Shannon standing across the room available to pray for someone. I knew she was my person. I walked over, held her shoulders, and told her my past hurt and asked her to pray for healing.

She began praying and instantly I knew it was the voice of God. It sounded like Shannon, she was the one saying the words, but I knew God was talking through her. The things she said, she could not have known. The promises she made, were not hers to give. The immediate healing that occurred was not her doing... it was God.

After this, the band played one last song. We danced, we jumped, we stretched our arms to the sky. We praised Jesus, and I was totally free.

I know what freedom feels like, and I want it more for you than you could possibly know. So I'm going to ask some tough questions, that I want you to answer honestly - What is holding you back? What battle is God asking you to stop fighting, so He can step in and win it for you? Ask Him for freedom, I promise, promise, promise, He is GOOD and FAITHFUL!

God wants you to be free because he loves you dearly.